Are You Trying To Change Your Partner?

Hi friends! Often times on our journey to peace and happiness, we automatically start to look outward of ourselves for happiness. But, again I say, that we live in our own little universe in our heads. All our senses of existence come from within. So the only person that can bring us true happiness is ourselves. But, because we don’t realize happiness comes from within, we often times use romantic relationships as a gateway to potential happiness. And because of that, we often enter and ruin relationships with unfair and unrealistic expectations for someone to make us happy. One of the many ways we ruin relationships is going into a relationship in hopes of finding the perfect mate that will suit our every need. And if they don’t, then they need to change.  That mindset has already set your relationship up to fail just off that notion alone. Now you have put a major responsibility on someone else; and that’s not fair. So, you seek out the perfect guy/ girl and carry with you all these false unrealistic expectations. A lot of the time we notice physical appearance first. If we are really attracted to them, we are often too willing to make some exceptions on personality traits that are totally different than ours. We often will say to ourselves, well……I don’t like how he/ she talk too much, but I guess we can deal with that later. When you say “deal”, you mean change😆. Or, you might say, he/she is a mama’s boy/girl, but I will “deal” with that later.

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Just stop right there! You already ruined your relationship before it even started! You’re going into the relationship claiming you want to change someone! 

You’ll also argue that he/ she is so cute that you’ll overlook it! Or, you’ll say that he/she is so nice despite the fact. Besides, I know he/ she will make me happy😒. So you get together and sparks fly; You have that sweet high you get when you’re in a new relationship. But, eventually, the honeymoon is over, and now you really notice the flaw in that person you said you was going to “change”😆. But, that trait you find annoying  is part of their personality, and they’ve let you know that they are not changing anything!  Now you feel angry, resentful, and dissapointed because you found out they won’t “change”; despite the fact that they never knew you had a problem with them in the first place. They weren’t aware that you made up this list of changes that they were supposed to eventually live up to.

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But you say if they really loved you, they would “change,” right? I hear this sooooo many times in relationships. Why can’t you change? Why won’t you change? If you just change, I’ll then be HAPPY. Well, let me tell you the solution to the problem. First, don’t get into a relationship purely in hopes of another person making you happy. No one can bring you pure happiness. That comes from within. Secondly, who are you to try and mold and shape anyone. That’s not your job; just like no one should try and change you. Healthy relationships are not about sculpting each other to create the perfect man/ woman, it’s about bringing your differences together so you can compliment each other.

For example, he/ she talks a lot, but it doesn’t bother you because you’re quiet and shy, so they help bring out your talkative side. Or, he/ she is a mama’s boy/girl, but that’s okay; you always needed a parent figure in your life anyway. Get it? Differences is supposed to compliment, not annoy. If something about that person bothers you, and you feel like that’s something you will want to eventually “change,” say next! That person will only resent you for trying to change them and you will resent them for not changing. That’s unnecessary pressure to put on each other. The best relationship is when you both can be exactly who you are. When you take each other as is. We always say we want someone to love us for us, but we make a list of things that we want to change on someone else. If the other person wants to change something for you, then that’s fine; it should solely be something that the other signed up for. But you should never try and force it on someone by telling them it’s to make you happy and it’s just for your comfort. That they can fix the relationship by simply changing.  It should be something for the betterment of you both. Like for example a bad temper. It’s part of their personality, but it’s not a healthy trait to keep for the sake of you both. But, still at the end of the day, they should still change for them first, then you. Once you can get out the mindset of trying to change others, your relationships will go much smoother. It’s either you like them or you don’t.

You will naturally have a Minimal amount of things that are different about you both, but those things should be embraced just as much as the things you have in common. 

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Betcha didn’t know!😆

How To PursueYour Life’s Purpose

https://betchadidntknowthis.wordpress.com/2017/03/11/how-to-pursueyour-lifes-purpose/

Photo credit.

Pixabay.com

 

I do not own photos, but I do own articles.

Copyright©2017 Betcha didn’t know! All rights reserved.

Do Not Carry Your friend’s Baggage!

Hi friends! I want to continue on with the subject of extra baggage. But this time I want to talk about other people baggage. When we have friends, we often think it’s our responsibility to help carry their baggage because that’s what friends are for, right? I mean we share all sorts of things with our friends. Secrets, clothes, food, money, and hobbies. So why not share our emotional baggage, right?

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I mean since you put most of your bags down that made room for theirs! Right? Wrong! Please don’t pick up other’s either because it will only drain your positive energy. For example, I used to have a friend who was having relationship problems. At first I was ok with being her shoulder to cry on because that’s what friends are for. But, despite being a shoulder to cry on, I wanted her to also start thinking of a soultion to Conquer her problems. Just continuously crying on my shoulder wasn’t helping anything. She never wanted to hear advice or think of solutions, she just wanted to complain and complain. Or, she would lie and say she would start doing the solutions, but didn’t. I guess I was supposed to be just the ” listening” ear.  She wanted me to cry with her and to feel her pain daily. She would talk on the phone with me daily for hours with her poor me. It got to the point where she was hinting at her moving in with me so we could be two miserable women crying together!  She even wanted me to start down talking my husband because if she wasn’t happily married why should I? We were supposed to share heartache and bash men together! Since we were friends, she felt like I was supposed to share her problems.  I literally started to feel like I was drowning in her problems. The next thing she started complaining about was family issues. Her mom, sisters, brother! Still no talk of solutions.  She started handing me all her bags one by one!

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Sadly, when I saw that she didn’t desire a solution, and she thrived on the drama, I had to let her go and give all of her bags back.

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As a friend you are not there to continuously support their drama. You’re there to help bring about a solution. You’re supposed to uplift each other. Be the one to tell your friend to put their baggage down. If they don’t want to, you will find yourself carrying their emotional burden. After they are finished crying with you, they will leave feeling a little bit better, but you will be stuck feeling their negative energy! Especially if they start putting negative ideas into your head about your own life. And then when they need you again, they’ll come back and dump more negative energy on you. And trust me, it rarely ends. I checked in on her 2 years later, and nothing changed with her. She was with another guy complaining about the same thing😬😆! You’ll notice that people who thrive on drama keep the party going forever. No matter how much money you give, how much advice,or how much support you lend, it’s never ending! So please, if your an empath like me, Run!!!!😆

Give them their bags/ problems and let them move on!

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Betcha didn’t know!🙈

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It’s that time of year again! Your Brain needs spring cleaning!

https://betchadidntknowthis.wordpress.com/2017/03/05/its-that-time-of-year-again-your-brain-needs-spring-cleaning/

Photo credit.

Pixabay.com

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I do not own photos, but I do own articles.

Copyright©2017 Betcha didn’t know! All rights reserved.

Did You know That You Are A Magician? Start Manifesting Now!

Did You know your mind is a very powerful tool. So powerful that our whole existence is locked into our brain. Not someone else’s, but ours. We can’t jump from brain to brain in other people. Our brain is our consciousness/ world. We so often try to exist outside of our own brain/ consciousness. But guess what! We can’t control other people or all of the circumstances that happen outside of ourselves. And we drive ourselves crazy trying! You can’t, so just control your own brain/ reality, okay? Don’t believe your whole existence is in your head? Okay, Cover your ears, close your eyes, and imagine your touch, taste, and smell is gone. Also, imagine that you’re paralyzed too! Now what do you have left?  You might as well be a rock. But, one of the only things left working is the part of your brain that’s in control of your consciousness, right? So despite being in this paralyzed state with no outer senses, you still have this inner world going on in your brain/ head.  And right now you’re imagining yourself smelling flowers and you can even imagine the odor.

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Despite not being able to interact with the outside world, you’re still living and controlling things in your head. So my point is, don’t stop controlling your existence just because you can see and sense your surroundings. You are not your surroundings. When you observe the outside world, you are merely appreciating and observing other peoples appearance, creation, and ideas/ imagination. Everything you see is someone else’s idea and creation. The table, chair, television, shoes, Shirt, your house, car and so on and so on! Even your job is the result of someone’s else’s imagination. If you work at McDonald’s, you’re living someone else’s idea that they manifested into their outer reality. McDonald’s merely started out as something in someone’s mind. We all have the power to manifest ideas into reality. That’s a God given gift. Most of the time we don’t take advantage of that power because we are impatient, lack faith,  and we think that only outside influences control us. We want to be like the magicians we see on tv and tap our magic wand and BOOM! There it goes! There’s our new house! No, sorry, that’s only on tv! In this reality, our brain is our magic wand. Notice MAGI in imagination. MAGI comes from magic. Our brains encompass the magic. Once we imagine what we want, all we have to do is take the steps to manifest it into reality. How long the manifestation take to manifest depends on how many steps has to be taken to accomplish your goal, your patience, faith, and determination. McDonald’s wasn’t an overnight success. It took time. First the owner had to create the vision of McDonald’s in his head, then he proceeded by  investing money to get it built, hiring people, deciding the menu and much more. Creating a business takes time and work. But, after years and years of dedication, McDonald’s is one of the biggest franchises in the world. Disneyland too. Disneyland was merely just a thought ( imagination. ) So, using those examples should remind you just how powerful our mind/ imagination is. Write down all your thoughts and make a  Record of all the things you want to manifest. Once you have written down everything, pick out one you want to work on first. Doing one at a time will allow you to put all your thought, time ,and resources into it allowing for better results. And everytime you accomplish one, check it off. Start off small first. The first goal I recommend is learning to be positive.Because if you are under depression or anxiety, you can’t manifest anything. You have to be positive and believe anything is possible!  Do this and you’ll start to see just how in control you’re of your personal world!

Are you going to waste your God given gift? What are you going to manifest? 

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Betcha didn’t know!😆

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Are you going to let negative energy and thoughts bully you?

https://betchadidntknowthis.wordpress.com/2017/03/03/are-you-going-to-let-negative-energy-and-thoughts-bully-you/

Photo credit. Pixabay.com

I do not own photos, but I do own articles.

 

Copyright©2017 Betcha didn’t know! All rights reserved.

The story of Kitten part 12 (Ending ! )

 

Tom – “Fine!!!!”

( Tom opened the door.)

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Gloria- “Hello Tom.”

Tom- “Gloria! What are you doing here! You’re not following the restraining order!”

Gloria- “Why should I follow the rules when you don’t! You go around town finding hearts to break. You replaced me with Cindy, then you replaced her with that redhead! You’re hilarious! ”

Tom- “What! It’s none of your business who I date! Besides, we didn’t work out, so yes, I moved on! Besides, how did you find me? Are you still stalking me!? ”

Gloria-” I dedicated 4 years of my life to you. Then you just up and left me for Cindy! So yes, I’ve been following you. And I saw the trouble Cindy was causing you; so I killed her for you. You’re not moving on this time. I killed Cindy and now I’m going after your little redhead! She’s not getting in the way of us getting back together either! ”

Tom- “You what!”

Gloria- “Yeah, I walked up behind Cindy and strangled her. Then I put pills in her mouth and hand to make it appear as though she committed suicide. Clever, right? ”

Tom- “Well, they didn’t fall for your suicide plot because they are blaming Kitten and I for it!”

Gloria- “Ha! Oh well, they’re not after me either way! So that gives me time to get your precious little kitten next!”

Tom- “Stay away from her! If you touch her…..”

Gloria- “What!”

(Gloria pulled out a Gun and pointed it at Tom. )

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Tom-” Put that away! That’s not going to solve anything. ”

Gloria- “Oh yes it is. It’ll force you to take me to Kitten’s house, so let’s go!”

( Gloria shoved the gun on Tom’s rib.)

Tom- “You’re going to regret this! ”

Gloria- “yeah, Yeah, let’s go! ”

( Tom was lead to his car by gunpoint. She continuously pointed the gun at Tom as he drove.)

Gloria- “Don’t make any slick moves or you’ll be joing Cindy! ”

Tom- “I can’t believe you would go this far to get me back! I’m not going to let you hurt Kitten!”

Gloria-” We’ll see about that! ”

( Tom drove up to Kitten’s house. Gloria lead him out the car at gunpoint. Tom knocked on Kitten’s door while still having a gun shoved to his back. Kitten opened the door looking confused. )

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Kitten-” Tom why are you here? And who is she behind you? ”

Tom- “Ummm…….”

Kitten- “Tom! Say something! ”

(Gloria pointed the gun at kitten.)

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Kitten- “Oh my God! ”

Gloria- “Soooo you’re the one Tom left Cindy for. Did you know that Tom left me for Cindy? ”

Kitten- “No. But I think I can tell why.”

( Gloria pistol whipped Kitten. Kitten fell down onto the couch on the porch.)

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Tom- “Kitten! Look Gloria! This is between us; leave her alone.”

Gloria-“There is no us as long as she exist.”

Kitten- “Look, I don’t want him! Take him. He’s not worth my life!”

Gloria- “I wish it was that easy. Cindy said the same thing before I killed her.”

Kitten- “You killed …….”

Gloria- “Yes! Look, you seem like a nice girl; don’t be fooled. Just like he left me for Cindy, he’ll leave you. I really wish I didn’t have to kill you, it’s just that I need everyone out the way so Tom and I can start over. It’s nothing personal. ”

Tom-” You’ll never have me!”

( kitten quickly jumped up and kicked the gun out of Gloria’s hand when she was looking back at Tom.)

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( Tom quickly grabbed Gloria from behind as Kitten picked up the Gun and pointed it at her. Gloria had a look of panic.)

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Tom- “Kitten call the cops! ”

( Gloria started crying as Kitten Grabbed her cell.)

Gloria-” Tom don’t do this! I love you…..I just want things to go back to the way it used to. When you loved me. I Never meant to hurt you. ”

Tom-“Do you think that I could possibly forgive you after this! You’re crazy! Look, what we had was in the past. you’ve always had a bad temper and obviously things with you hasn’t changed.”

Gloria-  “please! ”

( Gloria then quickly head butted Tom from behind and ran towards Kitten. Just when Gloria got close, kitten pistol whipped Gloria and she fell to the ground unconscious.)

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Tom- “kitten! ”

( Kitten stood over Gloria body)

Kitten- “One turn deserves another! ”

( The police drove up and ran up to the porch.)

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Tom- “Thank God you guys are here! She tried to kill us! She’s the one who killed Cindy! ”

Officer-” I’ll have to take you all in! Put your hands up! ”

( Gloria woke up and sat up.)

Gloria- “I’m going to kill you!!!!!!”

( Just when Gloria was going to get up, the cops knocked her back down.)

Officers- “Get down! You’re under arrest! ”

Kitten- “See, we told you. She’s the one hostile! ”

Officer- “Fine. You’re lucky. ”

( The paramedics drove up and ran up to the porch.)

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Paramedics- “Are you guys okay? ”

Kitten- “I was pistol whipped. But I guess okay other than that. ”

( As the Paramedics treated kitten, you could hear Gloria screaming in the background as the cops were taking her away.)

Gloria- “You’re going to pay for this Tom!!! Both of you! I promise! ”

Tom- “haha! Her big mouth has always gotten her in trouble! ”

Kitten- “Why are you always dating crazy women? And now I’m questioning myself!? Haha! ”

( Tom leaned over to give her a kiss.)

Kitten- “Not so fast! I’m not happy with you! This girl came out of the blue. You have a lot of explaining to do! How do I know there’s not someone else hiding? ”

Tom- “I promise it’s not! ”

(Tom’s dad and Kitten’s Mom walked up.)

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Tom’s Dad- “What on God’s green earth is going on here!? ”

Mom- ” Yeah, there’s Police, ambulance, and blood! Kitten what happen to you?! ”

Kitten- “let’s go inside, Tom has a lot to explain! Right Tom!?”

Tom- “Ummm, right! Haha! ”

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3 years later

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Tom- “See, I told you there was no one else. This is 0ur 3 year aniversary and we’re only growing stronger.”

Kitten-“Yeah, I was really seriously deciding to call it quits after Cindy’s death. Then when Gloria showed up, I just couldn’t take it! ”

Tom- “Yeah, but DNA test showed Gloria killed Cindy. My hands were clean. She was sent to prison and everything has been peaceful ever since. There were no more women! ”

Kitten-” Well, true. But it’s still taken me time not to be skeptical of you and your past. But you have proved to be worthy over the years. Haha! I can’t believe our parents got married too.

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But, luckily now my mom has someone besides me to count on! Now I can move on with my life! ”

Tom-” You mean our life right?! ”

Kitten-” Right! ”

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Tom and kitten were meant to be after all! Things were a rollercoaster in the beginning with Cindy’s jealousy, her death, and Gloria’s mysterious appearance. But all worked out in the end, and now it’s smooth sailing ! Especially with Tom and Kitten’s bundle of joy on the way! And they lived happily ever after!!!😊

Thanks for reading my story guys! That was my first time writing a story for others to read.  I had fun writing it. It was flawed considering my amateur writing, but you guys hung in there and enjoyed it just the same. Thank you😉. 

Betcha didn’t know! 😊

Read part 11 here👇

https://betchadidntknowthis.wordpress.com/2017/03/05/the-story-of-kitten-part-11/

Photo credit: pixabay.com

I do not own photos, but I do own story!

 

How To PursueYour Life’s Purpose

Hi friends! I wanted to talk about living your life’s purpose. If you are stuck doing things in your life that you’re not happy with, you’ll naturally be miserable. Your life should fit together like a perfect puzzle. If you try to fit pieces of yourself into areas that don’t belong, you will have constant struggle. I believe we all come to this earth with specific tasks we are supposed to complete and gifts and talents to share. Have you ever thought about death and then said to yourself that you can’t die yet; You still have so much more you need/ want to do? It’s like subconsciously we know God assigned us things to do and we won’t be at rest until it’s complete. I’ve noticed some people that are like 90 and up that seem to be more content with dying. They don’t seem to be so anxious about their life’s purpose like us younger people do. They seem to just want to retire, relax, and live out their last days in peace. It’s like they know a lot has been accomplished already. So now you’re probably asking yourself what is your life’s purpose.

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This is quite easy to answer. What is your favorite hobby? If you only had one day left on earth to enjoy any hobby of your choice, what would it be? Is there a hobby you love so much that you would do it without pay? Art, golf, singing, writing, basketball, gaming, reading? The list can go on and on! We often overlook our life purpose because we let our desire for financial stability to take front seat. When we are growing up, we are often given a list of jobs to choose from based on income potential. Like doctor, lawyer, athlete, banker and etc.

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And when we don’t personally feel fulfilled after picking out one of those preselected jobs, we feel confused because our life’s purpose is to get a job/ career that makes a lot of money right?

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Or, perhaps you didn’t have the time or resources to get a high paying job, so now you’re stuck working at McDonald’s asking yourself how did you get stuck there! How? Because you were so stuck in survival mode, you didn’t think much about what you really wanted to do. Because hey, we have bills to pay, who has the time to make money off a hobby, right? Well….. Actually yes, you’re right. Some hobbies don’t make as much as others. But, if you are strategic, you can have your dream job.

Say for example you work at McDonald’s, and after work you love to make dolls.

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You have a whole collection of dolls you have made in your spare time. It’s just your hobby so you’ve never considered making money off of it; despite the fact you are quite talented at it. And if I suggested you make money off of it, you would laugh it off and say that you couldn’t possibly sell enough dolls to cover your bills. It’s better left off as a hobby. Well, yes that’s true for now. Just picking up and leaving your day job to sell dolls would definitely be a bad idea. Because you’re right, it won’t cover your bills. But….that doesn’t mean that it won’t cover your bills eventually. Our problem is that it’s hard to picture ourselves not getting instant gratification and income. It’s hard to picture ourselves giving out free time or charging little as an amateur. But, like with anything else in life, things take time. Overnight success is very rare. The best thing to do would be to sell your dolls to neighbors, rent a booth over the weekend, or sell it on ebay while working at McDonald’s. Yes, sells might be slow at first, but over time, sells will eventually increase more and more. When you use your God given talent, God provides opportunities in due time. But, you have to be willing to take the first steps. You have to be willing to make sacrifices here and there. You have to believe God will properly reimburse your work eventually. You have to give some to get some. Perhaps you will have to sell your dolls below market value at first just to wet consumers appetite and get your name around. Eventually God will provide you with the income you deserve and then some if you’re patient. And this same logic/ strategy goes for any other hobby. Persistence, faith, patience, sacrifice!

Don’t let your Dream job be an
Abstract thought, make it reality!

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Betcha didn’t know!😆

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Photo credit: pixabay.com

I do not own photos, but I do own article.

This is the day that the LORD has made; let us rejoice and be glad in it!

Hi friends! I’m tired today, so I won’t be doing a long post. This one will be a little Nuance from my other post. This one is a little more personal. But I wanted to share my feelings and thoughts today. This morning I have so much joy. No, not because I received money or a gift from a person. But because I allowed myself to enjoy what I have around me at this moment. Despite the fact that there is a lot of ugly in this world, I stepped outside of it and looked around me. God created so much beauty around us to enjoy. Yes, he made it just for us. He created the soft grass to walk on barefoot. Warm sun to shine on our faces. Beautiful delicate flowers to smell. What a sweet aroma! Tall beautiful trees to tower over us with it’s beauty! I love to hear God’s creatures chirping ( birds). Please be gentle with God’s gifts to you. Yes, so many gifts!  He wanted you to have a slice of heaven on earth. The beauty of nature looks like heaven doesn’t it?

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Go hug a tree, person, and animal. He made them just for you! Yes! You, you, and you! Hug your loved ones. He sent them just for you. He wanted you to be surrounded by love. They are vessels for his love to shine through.  See his beauty! And, why not indulge in a treat today. Those little treats are awesome. I recently ate an ice cream cone while sitting in the sun. I knew I shouldn’t eat a lot of sugar, but, that’s what made me laugh. I was like a child doing something I know I shouldn’t!😆 I thanked God for tastebuds. It was sooooo yummy. Thank you lord for those simple moments. Thank the lord for waking us up this morning. We get another chance today! I love you readers too. You are all God’s creation. How beautiful you are. You’re all different colors, sizes, and shapes! What a gift to have friends!

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Pass God’s love on today, okay? Simply a smile to everyone you see will do! I pass my love, joy, and smile on to you today!

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This is the day that the LORD has made; let us rejoice and be glad in it!

Betcha didn’t know! 🎉

Photo credit: pixabay.com

https://m.shutterstock.com/images/281240780

I do not own photos, but I do own articles!

WILL TOMORROW EVER COME

Very inspirational testimony and story!

The Writers Desk

I lay in the hospital bed at Columbia Presbyterian in New York. It is ten thirty pm., and the nurses continue to give me enemas to clean out my colon. I can barely walk at this point and tell the nurse this is the last one. I feel like my legs won’t last another trip to the bathroom. The enemas stop and I am left with my thoughts about tomorrow morning. Will it be the last morning for me, will I never see my children again or my family for that matter. I left instructions with my husband and my sisters, they were trying to encourage me but with tears in their eyes. My children were four, nine and eleven. They needed me. I was only thirty nine and Cancer was my enemy. I prayed again that night to my God, please let me make it through this nightmare and…

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